Expand your horizons

I think all women need a partner, a man, to question us and make us really explore the things we do and believe.  They help us to evaluate our lives and see things in a way that only a testosterone-driven individual will see.  Surrounding yourself with like minded people will not help you to grow and expand your views. We need a husband to question our beliefs, our actions, and our thoughts to make us better people.  Whether it is questioning why we hang our bras to dry, or why we need shopping lists for every store, or why we dunk our cookies in milk, those little queries give us reason to pause and reflect.  Why am I doing this?  'Because I always have.'  But what if there is a better way?  What if drying our work pants on high really is faster, or not rinsing the dishes saves water?  Having a hubby around to question us not only irritates us, but it really does make us a better woman.

Lean on me

Not only does hubby have a lot of new things to learn at the new school, but the students are also facing big changes.  On the first day, the high school students learned they would not be allowed to carry any electronics.  I guess it was acceptable last year to have an MP3 player during lunch, but not anymore.

On Monday, one young lady separated herself from the group during lunch and was voicing her anger over the new rules.  Even though hubby didn't know her, he tried to talk to her and get to the real problem.  Sure, she was upset over losing that little escape by listening to her music, but her anger was really due to other things.  Her group of friends had parted ways for this school year since they all decided to attend another school.  This young lady was left at the school without her friends and support network.  Hubby went out of his way to talk with her and try to include her with the other students. When I visited his class on Friday, she was eating with the other high school students, laughing, and joining in the conversation.

Hubby has a big heart, and he really tries to understand and listen to his students.

Missed a few days

This has been a crazy, hectic week for us.  Hubby and daughter started back to school, at their new school. We've had to learn the new rules and make sure they have completed the various forms every day.  The new year is always hectic but this year was even more. To make matters worse, our Girl Scout troop started back up this week so I had to do a lot of prep for that.  I haven't posted any this week because I just didn't have time. 

I will give hubby a gold star for taking daughter bowling yesterday. We signed her up for a fall league for the first time.  She is really enjoying it so far.  I don't mind bowling, or even watching, but the smell in the bowling alley makes me sick.  I think it is the oil or whatever they put on the lanes.  It is like trying to breathe in motor oil.  My sinuses and allergies are already giving me problems, so I just couldn't bear the smell.  Hubby gladly took daughter to bowling and I stayed home to get things done here. 

Just a math teacher

The friend we went to visit today at the airport was on his way to Afghanistan.  He is a helicopter pilot and he was going to work over there for the next 6 weeks.  He has a wife and 2 children back home.  Hubby loved hearing some tales from the different types of missions that the pilot has done.  It was exciting to hear about the movie star being carried into a remote location.  It was amazing to hear about the technical aspects of the helicopters and what they can do. It was funny to hear how the pilot was trying to communicate safety to a group of Mexican pipeline workers who didn't speak English.

At one point hubby commented that he is just a math teacher.  I felt like he was selling himself short in so many ways! He is an amazing teacher. He not only teaches kids how to solve an equation, but he shows them that they can work through anything.  He cares about them when maybe no one else does.  He roots for their success and applauds their accomplishments. He does all of that and gets to come home to his wife and daughter everyday.  He doesn't have to leave us for extended time periods to go work. He gets to make a good living doing something he really enjoys.  He isn't just a math teacher! He is one heck of an awesome math teacher!

Loyalty

Today, one of hubby's long distance friends had a layover at a nearby airport.  It was unexpected, and we didn't know he was there until the plane had landed.  As soon as he called, hubby said we would go to meet him.  We had been gone away from the house from 9am until 5:30pm doing our Saturday errands.  We had just gotten the groceries unloaded at 5:45 when the call came in.  Hubby didn't care that we had been driving all over town all day, or that it would be another 1.5 hours in the car to make the round trip.  He knew a friend was in town and that was too important to pass up.  It was well worth the time and effort to rush to the airport for the 2 hour visit.  It was great to catch up and see hubby and his friend reminisce about past adventures.

Waking up happy

Wake-up sex.  Enough said!  ;-)

Gaggies

My hubby is known for his chocolate no bake cookies. We call them gaggies since you want to eat them until they make you gag.  He has perfected the recipe and makes them perfectly every time.   The recipe is a common one, but his secret is all in the timing. 

Animal lover

We were cruising down the main corridor of town, on a 4 lane divided highway.  Across the road, I happen to see a dog walking around at the intersection of a side street.  It was a daschund and he was way too close to the edge of the main highway.  I told hubby to turn around. His first response was why, what are we going to do about it?  But then he turned around for us to go check it out.  As we pulled over where the dog was roaming around, hubby  told me to hop out and grab the dog.  The little dog didn't have on a collar and wasn't close to any house.  When I got out of the car, the dog began barking and backing away from me.  I chased him and got him to run to a nearby house up the street.  I have no idea if he lives there, but at least he was off the street.

Hubby is a kind soul who loves animals.  He stops to move turtles, rescues cats from behind his school, and talks to our fish.

Reading

I love to read.  I like to read magazine, newspapers, fiction, non-fiction... anything!  It is a treat to curl up with a book at night before going to sleep and escaping to another place.  It is fun to wander around Barnes and Noble for hours.  Flying is made so much easier by treating myself to a new magazine or paperback.  It seems that my daughter has inherited my love of reading.  She can't be pushed or bribed to read, but will pick up something to read on her own.  That even reminds me of myself.  I hated being told in high school and college that I had to read a certain  novel because it was never what I wanted to read.  Daughter is the same way.  I have tried to get her to explore new series or more difficult books, but she always resists.  Eventually, she will pick up those items and realize that she really enjoys them.

As  much as she and I love to read, hubby hates it.  He has not read an entire adult book since we've been together.  He sees no benefit or pleasure to be gained.  However, he has read to daughter since the day she was born.  Whether it was Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, Rolie Polie Olie, or Magic Tree House, hubby has taken the time to read to/with our daughter.  We alternate nights putting her to bed and story time is the last few minutes of the day.  He looks forward to that special time as much as I do, even though it involves his least favorite activity.  I am so pleased that he allows us both to enjoy this hobby, and that he has encouraged it in our daughter.

Eternal companion

One of the lessons in church this week was about eternal marriage, not just in this life but for all eternity.  We believe we can stay with our spouses after the resurrection.  We believe that the whole purpose of this mortal life fails without marriage.  During class, everyone shared their views on this principle.  It was interesting to hear everyone's view on marriage and the belief that it will continue after death.  It was a recurring theme that most everyone viewed marriage as a singular event, not something to be taken lightly, or ended when the road got too tough.  One woman shared her view that we will be the best possible versions of ourselves in the next life.  We have so many challenges in this mortal life that we aren't always acting on our best behavior and doing the things we should be doing.  However, we should look at our spouse and know that despite any issues now, we will get to know their true goodness and spirit in the future.

I am lucky that I have married a man who believes in eternal marriage, and who knows that he wants to spend eternity with me.

Bowling

Hubby and daughter have gone bowling many times over the last 2 summers.  The local bowling alley participates in a "Kids Bowl Free" summer program.  Hubby bowled in a league a few years ago, so he is pretty good.  He enjoys playing, even if he has to use the bumpers with daughter.  He has been patient and encouraging as she has asked to go bowl over the summer break.

After seeing the announcement, she asked if she could bowl in the fall league.  We took her last weekend to get signed up.  Hubby is so excited that he wants to get her own bowling ball.  I don't know if we need to do that since she may outgrow it in a year, but she does own her own shoes.  I am happy that he shares in her love of the sport.

Playing catch up

I've been sick several times over the last 2 weeks, so I'm playing catch up with the blog.  I could probably just say that hubby took great care of me and put a ditto for several days.  But I reallly want to get 365 posts, so I'll keep looking for those little things to share.

Last night, our kitty was curled up in hubby's lap as we watched TV.  Kitty seems to think that hubby has the most comfortable legs for snoozy during TV time, while she prefers my feet at bedtime.  I'm so thankful that hubby loves animals as much as I do, and that is always willing to help care of our two furbabies.

Paper boy

Sunday night, I was so tired and miserable from being sick all day that I had forgotten about the newspaper in the driveway.  For safey reasons, I didn't want it to stay in the drive until Monday.  As I grumbled that I didn't want to get dressed to go get it, hubby hopped out of bed and pulled on his clothes.  Before I could say anything, he was out the door retrieving the paper. 

The Big D

I heard a commercial on the radio this morning for divorce attorneys.  It was rather creepy sounding with the announcer explaining that men should not just move out when asked to.  Women and their attorneys will go after data on Facebook, so men should use that angle too.  The whole theme of the commercial is that men are wronged during divorce but this firm can help.  It was all very sad.

Not 30 minutes before this commercial, the DJs were discussing divorce and older couples getting divorced.  One DJ explained how her parents got divorced after she was grown.  She said it was really nice to see them happy with their new partners.  She said it was easier on her to see them happy than living with them being unhappy.  Another DJ disagreed, saying that divorce was the worst experience to live through.

The Big D has only ever been a fleeting thought in our marriage, mostly during the early years.  We don't even allow ourselves that "out" so we have to keep on working to keep this marriage together.  There is just nothing about the process of divorce that sounds comforting or relieving.  I don't know how people can go through with it.  I never could.

Music Man

I love that hubby has musical talent!  I love music, but I don't have much talent, so it is great to be around someone who does.  We recently bought band hero for the wii and we've been having regular jam sessions.  Hubby can sing and play guitar pretty well, but he is awesome on the drums.  He was a drummer in high school and played in the marching band.  Of course, he brags that his years in marching band were the best years for the group.  They won all the awards and were the best!  Whatever!  :-)   He likes to look back on those glory days fondly, so I won't deny him his fun.  I'm just glad that those talents haven't left him!

Good cop, bad cop

I heard a guy call into the radio last week about a situation with his kids. His wife was out of town, so he was wondering if he had to bathe his kids while she was gone.  He told the DJs that when Mom is away it is like a vacation from Mom rules, so they were just having a blast doing whatever.  He thought that taking them to the pool everyday was good enough for a bath.  Of course, the callers and the DJs ripped him a new one for not bathing his kids.  It made me think back to the times I am gone for work..... 

My husband is not the babysitter who gets to come in and run the show only when I am out of town.  He is the other parent.  He makes rules and enforces them too.  Sure, they made eat out a little more, or stay up a little later, but that is because that is more hubby's preferences.  He isn't trying to go against my wishes.  He isn't telling our daughter that they are throwing MY rules out the window.  He is my co-parent and our rules stick even when I am not here. 

Another shout out for the nurse!

I woke up with a horrible migraine yesterday.  I had all of the symptoms and was unable to function for a few hours.  My sweet hubby was right there to get me whatever I needed to feel better. 


I am so behind on this blog, but I promise to get caught up soon!  I have the ideas, but finding the time to sit and blog is the problem. 

Little Things

A few years ago, we heard someone talking about the little things that couples should do for one another.  I can't even remember who, when, or what all was said now.  My hubby picked up on one suggestion and has carried it out since then.  Whenever my soap gets to that too-small-to-hold-on-to stage, a new bar magically appears.  I never get in the shower to discover I forgot to replace it.  It is always done for me.  It makes me smile and puts me in a great mood to have that small reminder that I have a partner who wants to do the little things for me.

A Real Good Man

I feel the need to give thanks today that I married a really good man.  He isn't perfect, and he makes mistakes like everyone does.  But when I go through my list of good characteristics, he meets them all.  He doesn't drink alcohol, he doesn't smoke, he has never touched any kind of drugs, he doesn't curse, he doesn't cheat, he doesn't scream, and he goes to church when he is expected to be there.  Outside of that list, anything else is just a nuisance and can be dealt with.  He sizes up on the important parts and that is what matters.  I am very lucky.

Sharing Time

Today, hubby and daughter start at their new school.  It isn't actually the beginning of the school year, but rather a two week camp with fun activities.  This is still their first day with their new coworkers/class mates.  I can't wait for them to get home and tell me about their new friends and exciting activities. If I weren't married (and a parent), I wouldn't have other cool stories to listen to and I wouldn't have anyone to share my daily ramblings with.  (Unless, I poured it all out into a blog.  But you don't get the same feedback with laughter, smiles, and head nodding that way.)

The Big Picture

Are men capable of multitasking?  Of seeing the big picture?  Seeing ahead to how the project may actually end up?  If a man can do all of that, I want to meet him!

I've noticed over the last few weeks how often men are excused for their inability to see past the present moment.  For example....  I have been helping hubby clean his new classroom and get ready for the school year to begin.  While I was moving around putting up posters, cleaning desks, and organizing the cabinet, he was cleaning the refrigerator. And cleaning the refrigerator.  And STILL cleaning that refrigerator.  I finally had to ask him what was taking so long.  He didn't think to clean it out at the end of the previous school year, so now it was really nasty.  A quick wipe down back in May would have saved a lot of time now!  So while I was moving the unused posters to the cabinet, moving the pencils and erasers from the cabinet to the cubbies, and cleaning the cubicles, he was working the refrigerator.   Multitasking is just not something he can do.

I posted a picture already of the great planter hubby built.  It is really cool and I am very impressed that he made it without any directions.  However, he hung it right on the way of seeing to the playground in the backyard from the table. I would have looked at all of the porch railings and tried to find a spot that didn't obstruct our view or get in the way.  That just never occurred to him.

So, why do I stay married??  Oh yeah, I need to find a positive thing out of this frustration.  Hmmm...I stay married because it keeps my mind keen helping my hubby think through situations and get more things done.  LOL